HANDLING IRATE CUSTOMERS 101: STAYING CALM IN A PERFECT STORM

Leader’s Guide

Handling Irate Customers 101: Staying Calm in a Perfect Storm

1. Review the Principles Driving Your Team’s Customer Service Mission

2. Introduce the Lesson

SCRIPT: We’ve been working on problem-solving skills for a while now, so today I want to begin a five-part series on one of the most difficult problems in customer service: dealing with irate customers. You know who I

mean—those angry, in-your-face customers who have already lost their cool and seem to be blaming every problem they’ve had since childhood on you and the business. [Ask rhetorically.] Ever meet one of those?

I’m calling today’s lesson “Handling irate customers 101: Staying calm in a perfect storm.” This handout will help you to follow along.

Here’s the reality. When you’re facing angry customers, you’re dealing with two problems: first, the customers’ emotions, and second, the problem that made them angry in the first place. Put the two together and

there you are, caught in the middle of their perfect storm. At that moment, you have three choices.

STAGE 4. COMMIT TO ONGOING SERVICE TRAINING

SCRIPT: You can remain indifferent—which will only enrage customers even more. Or, you can let them upset you—and if you’re dealing with bullies, they have you right where they want you. Or, you can use each contact

to learn calming skills—which just might get the results the customer wants while also keeping you in good mental and physical health. Now which one do you think I suggest you choose? [This is, of course, a rhetorical question.] Right! Number three it is!

3. Explain and Discuss the Skill(s) to Practice.

SCRIPT: What are calming skills? There are four I’d like to share with you today and challenge you to practice during the coming week.

LEADER’S NOTE: Show Slide 101.2.

SCRIPT: The first is perhaps the most important of all and requires you to draw on your own emotional maturity. It simply says, “Keep your cool.” Easier said than done, right? But this is a key to handling all the irate people in your life, not just here at work. One way to do that is by not taking the situation personally, even when you feel personally attacked. [Offer an example from your own experience about what this looks, sounds, and feels like.]

To help you separate yourself from the attacker, I want you to keep two things in mind. First, this fact: “I am a professional who is paid to treat people professionally.

I will learn something from each encounter.” No matter how unprofessionally customers are acting, no matter how rude they may be, you don’t want to mirror their behavior. You need to hold your professional ground.

Second, I want you to focus on the customer problem or issue—not on the angry person in front of you. If you can ask yourself, “How can we solve this problem?”

rather than focus on all the nasty things about the customer that may be running through your head, then you’re in a position of strength and you’re in charge.

You’re not getting sucked into their emotions.

LEADER’S NOTE:

SCRIPT: To gain time to think, let the customer blow off steam. Often that’s all irate people need: someone to listen as they vent. So you become the “ventilator.” You don’t have to say anything at first. Just hold your

ground, make eye contact without “staring out” the customer, stand firmly on your two feet for balance—or if you’re sitting, put both feet firmly on the floor—breathe, and listen. It’s important you be aware of your body.

If you’re swaying from side to side, or leaning heavily on one foot, or hyperventilating, you appear to be a “pushover.” And you want to maintain that center of strength through your body language.

LEADER’S NOTE: Illustrate the above with your own body language. Be sure to include “comfortable eye contact.” For this, make eye contact, hold it for a comfortable length of time (15 to 20 seconds), look away for a few seconds, then return. Teach the team the importance of making the connection without staring at the person or looking everywhere but at the person.

SCRIPT: Whatever the situation, don’t argue. Let me say that again: “Don’t argue.” Repeat it after me: “Don’t argue.” There’s no need for a counter-attack. There’s no need to defend our products or services. There’s

no need to rationalize anything. Irate people are too emotional to hear that kind of information anyway.

When it’s clearly your turn to speak, immediately acknowledge the customer’s anger. No big song and dance, just something brief and to the point, such as, “I’m sorry you feel this way. I can only imagine how angry and frustrated you must be.” Don’t say, “I know how you feel,” because what can they shoot back at you? [Elicit responses, leading to “No, you don’t know how I feel!”] Customers can’t argue with you if you say, “I can only imagine.” And you can say that sincerely.

Obviously, we don’t want people angry with us, but the more professionally we can address the emotional part of the storm, the more easily we’ll get to the other part: the real problem.

So, what are the four calming skills? [Do a quick Q&A review.]

4. Conduct a Team Activity

LEADER’S NOTE: If you have a video clip of an employee’s encounter with an angry customer, use it—debrief what worked well and what didn’t. If not,

create a brief role-play of an angry customer “storming” at a front-liner (you might play the customer’s part).

Instruct the front-liner to focus on calming skills and respond with the acknowledgment statement. Coach him or her on body posture, eye contact, and the tone of the statement. Ask: How does it feel to be yelled at? How did it feel to focus on the calming skills? Were you aware of your body during this encounter?

5. Set Goals for the Week

LEADER’S NOTE: Tell the team that you are going to post the slides (designate the places where you’ll do this) and want them to look for opportunities to practice calming skills during the coming week.

Obviously, members can practice the skills with irate customers. They can also pair up to create their own scripts of situations they’ve experienced or observed. Instruct members to report back at the next meeting

with either one or both of the following: • Feedback on a real customer encounter. What happened? How did they use calming skills? What were the results?

• Two brief skits that illustrate “the dos and don’ts” of using calming skills. They should be prepared to act out their scripts.

On your part, consider videotaping the skits and adding the videos to your training library.

6. Assign Accountability for Follow-Up

LEADER’S NOTE: Everyone on the team is accountable for this assignment.

7. Announce Contest and Prizes

LEADER’S NOTE: If you wish, decide on a contest and prizes for this topic. You could offer small but meaningful prizes for the short-term result of the best story and/or script. A “small prize” might be an entry

into a drawing for a larger prize down the line. Also, you might recognize and reward “The Irate Customer Handler(s)” of the month, the quarter, and the year. 

Handling Irate Customers 101: Staying Calm in a Perfect Storm

1. Keep your cool:

• Don’t take it personally.

• Think: I am a professional who is paid to treat peopleprofessionally. I will learn something from each encounter.

• Focus on the issue: How can we solve this problem?

2. Let the customer blow off steam.

3. Don’t argue.

4. Acknowledge anger: “I’m sorry you feel this way. I can only imagine how angry and frustrated you must be.”

ASSIGNMENT OF THE WEEK

Complete one or both of these assignments:

1. Watch for opportunities to practice calming skills with angry customers. Be prepared to report on the situation:

• What happened?

• How did you use calming skills?

• What were the results?

• What did you learn from the experience?

• What could you do better next time?

2. Pair up with another team member and create two skits to illustrate the “do’s and don’ts” of using calming skills effectively. Be prepared to present the skits at the next team meeting.